Are you at the top yet?! Or How to climb a mountain!

Dear Friends,

We know that you, being avid supporters and practitioners of NLP, Coaching and all things that relate to personal development, have done at least one thing in your life that went beyond your everyday limits! We can also safely assume that you have even gone beyond the borders of your habits just for fun, right?!  

“If you cannot understand that there's something in man which responds to the challenge of this mountain and goes out to meet it, that the struggle is the struggle of life itself upward and forever upward, then you won't see why we go" ~ George Mallory

To climb or not to climb

Last week we went hiking in the Carpathians and decided to climb the mountain Rtanj. The mountain is probably considered an easy climb among skilled mountaineers. You can walk straight to the top. No extra equipment is really necessary. At the same time it is demanding enough that quite a few of those who set out to reach the top decide to save it for another day...

And this is precisely what got us thinking, and inspired us to write this week’s note. The fact that sometimes it looks easy to get to the top and it may also seem that no special equipment is necessary. Also, the fact that we seem to be inundated with ‘positive’ messages that tell us that everything we need is within us, and we have all resources available to get us to the topJ

This may be the case…however, there are very few real, concrete steps offered as to how to get to these resources, and what is that that we have with us that can get us to the top, to where our dreams await to turn into reality!

The mountain as a metaphor for life

You see, climbing a mountain is akin to climbing the ladder of life...Small steps...Progress...Looking back… Gauging as to how far we’ve gone...Going further...Finding the inner strength to continue...Seeing the top...Feeling excited...Proud...And then, sometimes with some people, that looking back to see how much progress we’ve made, and distance we’ve covered, can be enough to make them take their hiking shoes off, make a cup of tea, safe in the knowledge that the mountain will not move, and they can do it another day:-)!

There are other scenarios, the ones, where they say: Jeez, this is easy, I can do this...They’ve get two thirds up, and they quit...They invest so much energy, effort, resources into those two thirds, that continuing the climb seems so pointless...

Has that ever happened to you? To invest a lot of you into something, get almost to the top, and decide to descend...for whatever reason...If it hasn’t, it will:-)! We learn so much from these situations...That once we pick up the learnings, all we want to do is climb higher:-)

It is better to climb than to quit

I had a similar experience when I first went wall climbing. I was two thirds up, and the internal voice started nagging, cheering me on, reversely: ‘…you know you can do it, start descending, you’ve got a lot of work waiting, this is not a kind of sport you should take up, etc...’ I wanted to quit, and was very near to doing so, yet, the power of a peer group and an awesome team, made sure I stayed put and continue the climb...And boy was I grateful for that! It was one of those breakthrough moments in life, where in a short space of time you learn a lot about yourself, and about how you tackle life and everything it offers.

You have what it takes

We are a sea of resources, we have everything we need to get to the top, any top, no matter how high, what most people lack is resourcefulness! And that is what is lacking when we hear/read about ‘positive’ messages! Resourcefulness is one of the key factors required to get you to the top!

Looking for something that you already have, requires you to know where to look. What is the point of having all the resources if you are not resourceful enough to know where to go and look:-)!

With this in mind, may we invite you to start looking though your rich memory file of all the situations where you were resourceful, where you even surprised yourself, where you reached using your resources without even being aware of what you were doing...Once you find those moments, experience them as if they are happening now, bring them to the front of your mind, and you’ll find that resourcefulness is what led you to the top, and the resources were just your biggest supporters!

Let all those mountain tops you have already climbed in your life be your new starting point. You already know that you have a lot available when you reach deep inside for your inner strength. So … make a decision to make it a habit. And let’s meet at the top.

Wishing you a wonderful week and sending you oceans of love,

Your climbing-the-ladder-two-steps-at-the-time trainers,

Lidija and Thomas

Lidija Markovic– NLP Trainer (Classic & New Code), NLP Coach, Life Coach

Thomas Björge– NLP Trainer (Classic & New Code), NLP Coach, Life Coach

© Momentum Strategies 2013

How are you? Yes, You?

“Have patience with everything unresolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves as if they were books written in a very foreign language” ~ Rainer Maria Rilke

Dear Friends,

How are you? How has your week been? Has anything magnificent happened in it? Has it been the one to remember? Or has it just whizzed by you?! 

No time for reflection

Has it ever happened to you that you spend your day running around, doing errands, being there for everyone, stepping from one role to the next with no time to reflect on the previous one? If it has, rest assured that you are not alone. We live in the world where everything happens so fast, and before we blink it’s over:-).

A world where the natural ability of human beings to take a breather and reflect on their day has somehow been pushed aside and interrupted by a host of daily to do items and dear distractions like social media and TV.

“Great - How are you?”

Culturally the question “How are you?” means very different things. In the USA, generally, there is only one acceptable answer to it - and the answer has nothing to do with how you are or how you feel. In other cultures however, the question is a real question. How are you? It appears that the more economically developed we become, the more the answer to the question is expected to be a non committal “Great - How are you?”

Don’t get us wrong. There is nothing wrong with ritual courtesy. But there is an issue that emerges when it becomes more and more rare that people take the time to ask and answer the question for real - even to themselves!

Quick can be good

So, how does one, in a world that constantly demands more and more of us, adapt and move accordingly, while still staying in a strong First position and takes care of oneself! There are people out there who will judge those that cut corners (or do they really cut them?!), who opt for a quick solution, rather than taking a long winding road, that has been tried and tested, but didn’t give results.

And isn’t the whole point of coaching, attending lectures, seminars, workshops, that of finding a relatively easy, relatively quick route that will not necessarily request from us to spend our entire lives to get the desired results?! We are not talking here about cutting corners, going for a superficial and lacking in quality choice, but the one that has been tried, tested and gives results in a relatively quick time. So with the time we have, saved :-), we can do things that we like, things that interest us and yet at the same time won’t be a wishy-washy-superficial-lacking-in-quality fix.

Taking the time

There is nothing wrong with saving a little time. Yet, there is another kind of wisdom that is also worth exploring. The kind of wisdom that talks about meeting, and interacting with your inner self. The one that acknowledges and greets all the feelings that are much too often brushed aside or swept under the carpet. Because just saying: “Great - How are you?” is not enough to make you into a great person. Something else is required.

Taking the time - your turn

So, with this in mind, may we invite you to do the following exercise: on a daily basis take 5 minutes and just ask yourself the question: “How am I?” then have the patience to listen to the answer you give yourself. And by listen we mean not only to the words, but also to the images and feelings that come up. Don’t be to hasty to reason with what comes up, but be there and meet it and greet it like you would really like someone else to meet you were you to answer the question “how are you?” truthfully.

We wish you a wonderful week and sending you oceans of love,

Your NLP trainers,

Lidija and Thomas

Lidija Markovic– NLP Trainer (Classic & New Code), NLP Coach

Thomas Björge– NLP Trainer (Classic & New Code), NLP Coach

© Momentum Strategies 2013

The Door to Your Self

“My self confidence comes from the fact that I have discovered my dimensions. It does not befit me to make myself smaller than I am.” ~ Edit Södergran

Dear Friends,

There is a potential you. A you that is greater than you are at the present point in time. And that potential you is also a more authentic you. Your real you. However, oftentimes we are not fully open to that potential self.

At a recent workshop we delivered, there was, as always a mixed group of people – NLP trainers, coaches, psychotherapists, psychologists, business owners, engineers, students… A very diverse and a very interesting group.  Albeit diverse, they had one thing in common – a passion to take their lives to a higher level, to dig deep and uncover what is the difference that makes the difference.

What happened with the zest?

What happens when you are open to new learnings, discoveries, insights, and how come that zest doesn’t last… It comes in waves, and it goes away, and in between some people close themselves, shut themselves from the world if you like, and go back to the old established well known and familiar patterns…

This was the most pressing question, and the one that no matter where we work and who we work with, this kind of question or a variation of it, pretty much always comes up! In other words, what is it that we do, on our road to self-development and self-discovery that contributes to us shutting ourselves off, close ourselves from ourselves?! And when we do close ourselves from ourselves, who and what do we open ourselves to?

Getting the answer is not enough

This ain’t an easy one to answer, however it is not the answers we are looking for, it is the action that we are interested inJ! Answers sometimes serve the purpose of sidetracking us, lulling us into believing that ‘now we have the answer we are half way there’ kind of thing. Having an answer works for some things, yet when it comes to personal growth, we wind that answers play a very little role, as most people like to cling onto them, without really taking any action. Answers are a sure road to taking us to the world of words and rationalizations.

So why do we stop in our tracks and why do we close ourselves to ourselves when the shadow of a breakthrough appears?! A fear of the unknown?! A fear of not being prepared for that, which awaits us on the other side?! A fear of responsibility?!

A shadow of a breakthrough is not a breakthrough

Remember that a shadow of a breakthrough is not a breakthrough. Just like the map is not the territory. We all talk about great breakthroughs and wanting them. But do we really want them? Let’s face it, very few of us, are prepared to face them, and use the momentum that they bring.

Very often this has to do with self-sabotage, which is unconsciously nurtured, by many. And fed daily! And when you do this, you will inevitably be nurturing and feeding the nagging inner voice. The voice of: today is not the right day, wait until tomorrow. And then you will find it that the voice of self -sabotage needs company, and that’s where the guilt kicks in, and suddenly the veil of illusion slides down and you realize that time is of the essence and that if you continue with the same old shutting yourself from yourself, leaving the party just when it starts to get interesting and fun, you will find yourself with a handful of excuses and a myriad of “I could have …” “I should have …” sentences.

Making a decision will help

So instead of running away from the shadow of a breakthrough, make a decision to stick to your guns no matter what. Work with that breakthrough, welcome it! As shutting yourself from yourself is not befitting of you. You are bigger than that. Find that greatness that you have, and start operating from it more and more.

Because you cannot postpone starting to live your real life. Or actually the truth is worse. You can postpone your real life. Forever. And then the life you live will become your real life. So, if not now, then when?

With this in mind may we invite you to consider all the breakthroughs that could have happened in your life had you just had the guts to let go of the familiar old patterns, and see how you could learn from these insights, so next time you are on the verge of a breakthrough you open your arms and welcome it, rather than running away from it.

Wishing you a wonderful week and sending you oceans of love,

Your real life trainers,

Lidija & Thomas

© Momentum Strategies 2013

The power of a team

“A single arrow is easily broken, but not ten in a bundle.” – Japanese proverb

Dear Friends,

Have you ever found yourself helped and supported by your friends in your career, dreams, visions? We hope you have, if not perhaps you should upgrade your friends … J

Wow, what a couple of weeks this has been! Hectic days in Greece searching for a location for our upcoming NLP on the beach seminar (www.nlponthebeach.com) in October. Visiting different beaches, looking at different hotels, testing different restaurants – not a holiday; real work – enjoyable, yes. But real work. And finally we found a very good location with crystal blue water just beside the green lush nature, in a five star resort at two star prices for our participantsJ!

And then, immediately following Greece delivering a couple of lectures at the Medical Faculty in Nis, Serbia, during the conference ‘New trends in nephrology’. It is an interesting experience to talk about NLP strategies and how it can help in curing psychosomatic illnesses, to doctors, in an environment where every other presentation is made on powerpoint with graphs and statistics. We are proud to report that our lectures got a great reception and were even more pleased when doctors expressed interest in attending our training seminars.

But what really impressed us during the conference was the psychology of the person who organized the event and who invited us to speak – a noted academic and professor Spira Strahinjic. A living legend. An 88 year old visionary with the energy, ideas and attitude of a 25 year old! What a role model!  He has made, and is still making, a great and lasting impact on medical practice worldwide!

How did he manage to do all he did, was simple, as he puts it – he choose the right team of people, yet before that he had a good internal team! Now that is where the trick is ;-).

You see, some people choose a career, a field of interest and work work work … And occasionally they accomplish something … Some more than others, yet very often you hear how some of them would complain that they do all the work, and that their team sucks … That is largely true, as choosing a team is very close to an art form. It requires a special skill.

In order to make our dreams a reality, having an inner team is very important, as it largely decides on how we choose the external one. When we know what our values are, what our standards are, what our intentions are, for ourselves and within ourselves, then choosing a team and making the right selection is very easy.

Many of us like to be self-sufficient. We like to do things on our own. But consider how much more Rembrandt accomplished by having a team of assistants. Where would Henry Ford be without the right team, or Steve Jobs, or 

Richard Branson …

But often the team is invisible to the external world. Whether it is an institutional team – it is common that people who have made a name for themselves work at the same place as others who have made a name for themselves – or it is a home team; there is an old joke which illustrates this point: Hilary and Bill Clinton were driving on some presidential errand when they stopped to get gas for their vehicle. Hilary went inside the gas station and stayed for a long time, speaking smilingly with the manager, every once in a while tossing her hair back. When she came back to the car president Clinton asked her – who was that? – Oh, that was Mr So-and-so, and old flame of mine… The president thought about it for while, then he said with a smile - So, imagine that Hilary, if you had married him you would had been married to a gas petrol station manager. Hilary however simply answered – No, Bill. If I had married him, I would be married to the President of the United States.

So with this in mind, may we invite you to consider this critical factor that is the key to any success – the team within. How is your inner team? Take some time this week to check in and see what is the state of your value system, are standards constantly met, are your intentions clear, is there a good communication flow between the Conscious and Unconscious? Do all the members of your inner team pull in the same direction? Or do they pull you in different directions? Are they attempting to pull you in the same direction, but do so in an uncoordinated fashion, so that they sabotage each other? 

What would it be like if they were able to cooperate seamlessly? And find a way to spend some time considering the state of your external team? Who do you surround yourself with? Does your external team inspire you? Move you? Motivate you?

If you want to spend some time with a great group of people and explore how to get your inner team in order you are welcome to join us in Greece for our NLP practitioner on the beach (www.nlponthebeach.com) – or if you simply cannot wait until October, join us already this weekend in Belgrade for our Momentum NLP diploma.

Wishing you a wonderful week and sending you oceans of love,

Your playing-for-the-team trainers,

Thomas and Lidija

Lidija Markovic– NLP Trainer (Classic & New Code), NLP Coach

Thomas Björge– NLP Trainer (Classic & New Code), NLP Coach

© Momentum Strategies 2013

Razumeti sebe, razumeti druge

„Ne znate kako je, nemate pojma//Kada biste znali uradili biste i vi istu stvar!“ ~ Judas Priest (britanski bend)

Dragi prijatelji,

Da li ste se ikada našli u situaciji da neko donosi nepravedni sud o vama, neko ko nije imao uvid u vašu situaciju i pomislio da nešto radite zato što ste prosto takav tip osobe?

I da li ste ikada bili u situaciji da donosite sud o drugima zbog onoga što su uradili – zaključujući da su to uradili jer su takav tip osobe? Ako ste odgovorili potvrdno na ova pitanja, pripadate kategoriji „normalnih“ :-)! To je ono što većina ljudi radi. I prilično je prirodno.

Kada nešto uradite, vi poklanjate pažnju toj konkretnoj situaciji. To je ono gde dobijate informacije kako da postupite. Niko drugi nema uvid koji vi imate o tim okolnostima, i stoga su skloni da zanemare celu situaciju i da misle o vama kao o „tom tipu osobe“.

A naravno, vi radite isto. Ako je neko drzak prema vama to je sigurno zato što su drski. Ako je neko radostan, znači da je radosna osoba. Je li tako?!

Ako neki glumac igra inteligentan lik, mi ga doživljavamo kao inteligentnog. To može i ne mora da bude slučaj! To da je on inteligentan, naravno :-)!

Bolja opcija bi bila da se radi sasvim suprotno: da razmišljamo o svemu što radimo, kao o nečemu što biramo da radimo. I da razmišljamo o tome šta drugi rade, uzimajući u obzir njihovu situaciju, njihov kontekst.

Uvek imamo izbor! A naši izbori definišu naš karakter i našu sudbinu. Ako mislite da ste proizvod situacije u kojoj ste se našli, zaista bi trebalo da pročitate Sartra malo pažljivije. Egzistencijalizam nije samo tinejdžerska filozofija. To je pravac koji upućuje ka jednostavnoj istini: vi možete da birate. Imali ste izbor i evo vas tu. A ako ste izgubili sposobnost da birate – ako patite od pogrešnog uverenja da okolnosti kontrolišu vaše postupke, onda vam je preko potreban visoko kvalitetan NLP.

Stvar je u sledećem. Zamislite na momenat one koji vas pogrešno procenjuju i koliko bi vas bolje razumeli ako bi proveli samo malo vremena razmatrajući situaciju u kojoj ste.  A ovde leži i caka: koliko biste vi počeli da bolje razumevate druge ljude, njihove situacije i motive, ukoliko biste uzeli njihove okolnosti u obzir.

Imajući ovo u vidu, pozivamo vas da u toku sledeće nedelje razmotrite postupke par ljudi koje sretnete. Poželjno onih ljudi kojima ne biste tako lako rekli sve što mislite. I provedite neko vreme analizirajući okolnosti u kojima funkcionišu. Kladimo se da,  ako ovo budete radili dosledno, samo ovaj deo – provodili neko vreme da  shvatite stvari iz njihove perspektive, da vidite, čujete i osetite ono što i oni u sadašnjem trenutku, to će promeniti vaše razumevanje tih istih ljudi.

Zamislite kako bi bilo kada biste uzeli u obzir njihova prethodna iskustva i način na koji ih doživljavaju. Vaš ceo pogled na svet bi se promenio, i otvorio nove vidike!

Želimo vam divnu nedelju i šaljemo okeane ljubavi,

Vaši razumljivo razumevajući treneri,

Lidija i Thomas

P.S. Koristimo priliku da vas obavestimo da cemo od 14.6 početi sa NLP treninzima, seminarima i radionicama i u Beogradu!!!

Pozivamo vas da pogledate našu Momentum NLP Serbia Facebook grupu i našu Momentum Strategies Coaching Facebook stranicu i pridružite nam se sa komentarima, iskustvima, idejama i svim drugim stvarima vezanim za NLP lični razvoj i ekspanziju!!! Mi smo tu za vas!

Lidija Markovic Rosati, NLP Trener, Holistic NLP Trener, Hipnoterapeut, Master Neurostrateg, TimeLine terapeut. Osnivač Holistic NLP centra u Nišu. Živi i radi na relaciji Velika Britanija – Srbija. www.momentum-strategies.com

Thomas Björge – NLP Trener, NLP Coach (Klasični i Novi Kod). Živi i radi na relaciji Svedska, Norveška i Velika Britanija .

© Momentum Strategies 2013

Understanding You, Understanding Others

"You don't know what it's like, you don't have a clue
If you did you'd find yourselves doing the same thing too!”
~Judas Priest (British Band)

Dear Friends,

Have you ever found yourself being judged unfairly by others who lacked insight into your situation and thought you did what you did because that's the sort of person you are?

And have you ever found yourself judging someone else because of what they did - and concluding that they did what they did because they are that sort of person? If you answered ‘yes’ to these questions, you belong to the ‘normal’ :-) category! This is what most people do. And it is pretty natural.

When you do something, you are paying attention to that particular situation. That is where you get the information about how to act. No one else has the insight you have about that situation, and hence they tend to disregard it and think of you as this or that sort of person.

And of course you do the same. If someone treats you rudely it surely is because they are rude. If someone is happy, it means they are a happy person. Right?!

If an actor plays an intelligent character, we perceive him as intelligent. That may or may not be the case! Him being intelligent that is:-)!

A more rewarding option would be to do the exact opposite: to think of everything we ourselves do, as something we choose to do.  And to think of what others do, in terms of their situation, their context.

We always have a choice! And the choices we make define our character and our destiny. If you think you are the product of the situations you have found yourself in, you really should read Sartre more carefully. Existentialism isn't just teenage philosophy. It is a finger pointing directly toward the simple fact: you can choose. You had a choice and here you are. And if you have lost your ability to choose - if you suffer under the bad faith that circumstances control your actions, then you are in dire need of some high quality NLP.  

Here is the thing. Imagine for a moment those who misjudge you, how much better would their understanding of you be if they spent just a tiny fraction of time considering the situation you are in. And here is the clinch: how much better will you start to understand other people, their situations and motives when you take their situation into consideration.

With this in mind may we invite you to, during the forthcoming week, consider the actions of one or two people you meet. Preferably people of whom you would not be hard pressed to utter descriptive phrase or two. And spend some time analyzing the situation they are operating from. Our bet is that if you do this consistently, just this part, just spending some time attending to what other people see, hear and feel in the present it will alter your understanding of them.

Imagine what it would be like if you took into consideration their previous experiences and the way they filter them. Your whole worldview would change, and will open up new horizons!  

Wishing you wonderful week and sending you oceans of love,

Your understandably understood trainers,

Lidija & Thomas

Lidija Markovic Rosati– NLP Trainer (Classic & New Code), NLP Coach

Thomas Björge– NLP Trainer (Classic & New Code), NLP Coach

© Momentum Strategies 2013

„Ne želim da budem u milosti svojih emocija. Želim da ih koristim, da u njima uživam i da nad njima dominiram“ – Oscar Wilde

Dragi prijatelji,

Da li ste se ikada našli u situaciji u kojoj doživljavate emociju koju ste puno puta pre osetili? Naravno da jeste. A ako niste, čestitamo; pretpostavljamo da ste sada prosvetljeni Zen majstor. To je odlično. Molimo vas da nam pošaljete e-mail i podelite svoja iskustva :-)!

Suštinski, većina ljudi ima emocionalnu adresu. Nameštaj u njihovoj emotivnoj kući  se sastoji od istih komada nameštaja i svakodnevno je posećuju. Oni provode svoje živote živeći u malom skupu emocija.

E sada, jedno veoma bitno pitanje koje treba postaviti sebi je: Da li me emocije u kojima regularno provodim vreme služe? Da li mi moj emotivni dom pomaže da dostignem svoje dugoročne planove i snove?

Jer, vaša emotivna adresa nije samo mesto u kome živite ovog momenta. To je i pravac kojim putujete. To je broj autoputa  kojim vozite, pa gde on vodi? Prema istinskom Severu, ili Jugu?

Uopšteno govoreći, većina ljudi misli iste misli iz dana u dan, i ove iste misli rezultiraju istim emocijama, a ove iste emocije rezultiraju istim delima.

Ovo ne mora da bude loša stvar. Ako zaista uživate svirajući gitaru, radite to svaki dan – slušajući sopstveni napredak, vi ćete, u dogledno vreme, postići fini nivo majstorstva na svom instrumentu.

Ali isto tako, to može biti opasna zamka. Možete živeti život koji nije vaš pravi život. Neki ljudi prožive čitav svoj život na ovaj način. Razmišljajući o jednim te istim stvarima danima (a NE postoji uslov da ove misli imaju ikakve veze sa onim što doživljavaju tokom određenog dana!), posećujući par istih emotivnih stanja iz dana u dan, bazirajući svoje odluke i aktivnosti na ovim stanjima... i završavajući sa kreiranjem malo ili nimalo razlike ili avanture u svojim životima.

Sada, verovatno nije bio Albert Ajnštajn koji  je prvi rekao: „Definicija ludila je raditi jednu te istu stvar iznova i očekivati drugačiji rezultat.“ Ali ko god da je ta osoba bila, bila je na tragu nečega. Ako neko bazira sve svoje odluke na veoma ograničenom broju emocija, rezultati će biti skoro isti.

Imajući ovo u vidu, pozivamo vas da započnete nedelju prateći u koja emocionalna stanja  ulazite iz navike. Iz sata u sat postavite sebi pitanje: „Gde sam emotivno, u ovom trenutku?“ Kada odgovorite na ovo pitanje puno puta, možda počnete da prepoznajete svoju emocionalnu adresu. Tada je vreme da se zapitate: „Da li mi ove emocije pomažu da krenem u pravcu u kome želim da idem? Da li mi ova osećanja pomažu da kreiram i živim život kakav želim da imam i živim?“

Ako je vaš odgovor manje nego zadovoljavajući, onda je možda trenutak da se zapitate kojim osećanjima biste voleli da opremite svoj emotivni dom. I, šta biste mogli da učinite da bi ih načinili svojom novom emotivnom adresom?

Zelimo vam divnu nedelju i šaljemo ocean ljubavi,

Vaši treneri i lokalna služba za selidbu,

Thomas i Lidija

Lidija Marković – NLP Trener (Klasični i Novi Kod)

Thomas Björge – NLP Trener, NLP Coach (Klasični i Novi Kod)

P.S. Pozivamo vas da pogledate našu Momentum NLP Serbia Facebook grupu i našu Momentum Strategies Coaching Facebook stranicu i pridružite nam se sa komentarima, iskustvima, idejama i svim drugim stvarima vezanim za NLP lični razvoj i ekspanziju!!! Mi smo tu za vas!

© Momentum Strategies 2013