How are you? Yes, You?

“Have patience with everything unresolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves as if they were books written in a very foreign language” ~ Rainer Maria Rilke

Dear Friends,

How are you? How has your week been? Has anything magnificent happened in it? Has it been the one to remember? Or has it just whizzed by you?! 

No time for reflection

Has it ever happened to you that you spend your day running around, doing errands, being there for everyone, stepping from one role to the next with no time to reflect on the previous one? If it has, rest assured that you are not alone. We live in the world where everything happens so fast, and before we blink it’s over:-).

A world where the natural ability of human beings to take a breather and reflect on their day has somehow been pushed aside and interrupted by a host of daily to do items and dear distractions like social media and TV.

“Great - How are you?”

Culturally the question “How are you?” means very different things. In the USA, generally, there is only one acceptable answer to it - and the answer has nothing to do with how you are or how you feel. In other cultures however, the question is a real question. How are you? It appears that the more economically developed we become, the more the answer to the question is expected to be a non committal “Great - How are you?”

Don’t get us wrong. There is nothing wrong with ritual courtesy. But there is an issue that emerges when it becomes more and more rare that people take the time to ask and answer the question for real - even to themselves!

Quick can be good

So, how does one, in a world that constantly demands more and more of us, adapt and move accordingly, while still staying in a strong First position and takes care of oneself! There are people out there who will judge those that cut corners (or do they really cut them?!), who opt for a quick solution, rather than taking a long winding road, that has been tried and tested, but didn’t give results.

And isn’t the whole point of coaching, attending lectures, seminars, workshops, that of finding a relatively easy, relatively quick route that will not necessarily request from us to spend our entire lives to get the desired results?! We are not talking here about cutting corners, going for a superficial and lacking in quality choice, but the one that has been tried, tested and gives results in a relatively quick time. So with the time we have, saved :-), we can do things that we like, things that interest us and yet at the same time won’t be a wishy-washy-superficial-lacking-in-quality fix.

Taking the time

There is nothing wrong with saving a little time. Yet, there is another kind of wisdom that is also worth exploring. The kind of wisdom that talks about meeting, and interacting with your inner self. The one that acknowledges and greets all the feelings that are much too often brushed aside or swept under the carpet. Because just saying: “Great - How are you?” is not enough to make you into a great person. Something else is required.

Taking the time - your turn

So, with this in mind, may we invite you to do the following exercise: on a daily basis take 5 minutes and just ask yourself the question: “How am I?” then have the patience to listen to the answer you give yourself. And by listen we mean not only to the words, but also to the images and feelings that come up. Don’t be to hasty to reason with what comes up, but be there and meet it and greet it like you would really like someone else to meet you were you to answer the question “how are you?” truthfully.

We wish you a wonderful week and sending you oceans of love,

Your NLP trainers,

Lidija and Thomas

Lidija Markovic– NLP Trainer (Classic & New Code), NLP Coach

Thomas Björge– NLP Trainer (Classic & New Code), NLP Coach

© Momentum Strategies 2013

The Door to Your Self

“My self confidence comes from the fact that I have discovered my dimensions. It does not befit me to make myself smaller than I am.” ~ Edit Södergran

Dear Friends,

There is a potential you. A you that is greater than you are at the present point in time. And that potential you is also a more authentic you. Your real you. However, oftentimes we are not fully open to that potential self.

At a recent workshop we delivered, there was, as always a mixed group of people – NLP trainers, coaches, psychotherapists, psychologists, business owners, engineers, students… A very diverse and a very interesting group.  Albeit diverse, they had one thing in common – a passion to take their lives to a higher level, to dig deep and uncover what is the difference that makes the difference.

What happened with the zest?

What happens when you are open to new learnings, discoveries, insights, and how come that zest doesn’t last… It comes in waves, and it goes away, and in between some people close themselves, shut themselves from the world if you like, and go back to the old established well known and familiar patterns…

This was the most pressing question, and the one that no matter where we work and who we work with, this kind of question or a variation of it, pretty much always comes up! In other words, what is it that we do, on our road to self-development and self-discovery that contributes to us shutting ourselves off, close ourselves from ourselves?! And when we do close ourselves from ourselves, who and what do we open ourselves to?

Getting the answer is not enough

This ain’t an easy one to answer, however it is not the answers we are looking for, it is the action that we are interested inJ! Answers sometimes serve the purpose of sidetracking us, lulling us into believing that ‘now we have the answer we are half way there’ kind of thing. Having an answer works for some things, yet when it comes to personal growth, we wind that answers play a very little role, as most people like to cling onto them, without really taking any action. Answers are a sure road to taking us to the world of words and rationalizations.

So why do we stop in our tracks and why do we close ourselves to ourselves when the shadow of a breakthrough appears?! A fear of the unknown?! A fear of not being prepared for that, which awaits us on the other side?! A fear of responsibility?!

A shadow of a breakthrough is not a breakthrough

Remember that a shadow of a breakthrough is not a breakthrough. Just like the map is not the territory. We all talk about great breakthroughs and wanting them. But do we really want them? Let’s face it, very few of us, are prepared to face them, and use the momentum that they bring.

Very often this has to do with self-sabotage, which is unconsciously nurtured, by many. And fed daily! And when you do this, you will inevitably be nurturing and feeding the nagging inner voice. The voice of: today is not the right day, wait until tomorrow. And then you will find it that the voice of self -sabotage needs company, and that’s where the guilt kicks in, and suddenly the veil of illusion slides down and you realize that time is of the essence and that if you continue with the same old shutting yourself from yourself, leaving the party just when it starts to get interesting and fun, you will find yourself with a handful of excuses and a myriad of “I could have …” “I should have …” sentences.

Making a decision will help

So instead of running away from the shadow of a breakthrough, make a decision to stick to your guns no matter what. Work with that breakthrough, welcome it! As shutting yourself from yourself is not befitting of you. You are bigger than that. Find that greatness that you have, and start operating from it more and more.

Because you cannot postpone starting to live your real life. Or actually the truth is worse. You can postpone your real life. Forever. And then the life you live will become your real life. So, if not now, then when?

With this in mind may we invite you to consider all the breakthroughs that could have happened in your life had you just had the guts to let go of the familiar old patterns, and see how you could learn from these insights, so next time you are on the verge of a breakthrough you open your arms and welcome it, rather than running away from it.

Wishing you a wonderful week and sending you oceans of love,

Your real life trainers,

Lidija & Thomas

© Momentum Strategies 2013

The power of a team

“A single arrow is easily broken, but not ten in a bundle.” – Japanese proverb

Dear Friends,

Have you ever found yourself helped and supported by your friends in your career, dreams, visions? We hope you have, if not perhaps you should upgrade your friends … J

Wow, what a couple of weeks this has been! Hectic days in Greece searching for a location for our upcoming NLP on the beach seminar (www.nlponthebeach.com) in October. Visiting different beaches, looking at different hotels, testing different restaurants – not a holiday; real work – enjoyable, yes. But real work. And finally we found a very good location with crystal blue water just beside the green lush nature, in a five star resort at two star prices for our participantsJ!

And then, immediately following Greece delivering a couple of lectures at the Medical Faculty in Nis, Serbia, during the conference ‘New trends in nephrology’. It is an interesting experience to talk about NLP strategies and how it can help in curing psychosomatic illnesses, to doctors, in an environment where every other presentation is made on powerpoint with graphs and statistics. We are proud to report that our lectures got a great reception and were even more pleased when doctors expressed interest in attending our training seminars.

But what really impressed us during the conference was the psychology of the person who organized the event and who invited us to speak – a noted academic and professor Spira Strahinjic. A living legend. An 88 year old visionary with the energy, ideas and attitude of a 25 year old! What a role model!  He has made, and is still making, a great and lasting impact on medical practice worldwide!

How did he manage to do all he did, was simple, as he puts it – he choose the right team of people, yet before that he had a good internal team! Now that is where the trick is ;-).

You see, some people choose a career, a field of interest and work work work … And occasionally they accomplish something … Some more than others, yet very often you hear how some of them would complain that they do all the work, and that their team sucks … That is largely true, as choosing a team is very close to an art form. It requires a special skill.

In order to make our dreams a reality, having an inner team is very important, as it largely decides on how we choose the external one. When we know what our values are, what our standards are, what our intentions are, for ourselves and within ourselves, then choosing a team and making the right selection is very easy.

Many of us like to be self-sufficient. We like to do things on our own. But consider how much more Rembrandt accomplished by having a team of assistants. Where would Henry Ford be without the right team, or Steve Jobs, or 

Richard Branson …

But often the team is invisible to the external world. Whether it is an institutional team – it is common that people who have made a name for themselves work at the same place as others who have made a name for themselves – or it is a home team; there is an old joke which illustrates this point: Hilary and Bill Clinton were driving on some presidential errand when they stopped to get gas for their vehicle. Hilary went inside the gas station and stayed for a long time, speaking smilingly with the manager, every once in a while tossing her hair back. When she came back to the car president Clinton asked her – who was that? – Oh, that was Mr So-and-so, and old flame of mine… The president thought about it for while, then he said with a smile - So, imagine that Hilary, if you had married him you would had been married to a gas petrol station manager. Hilary however simply answered – No, Bill. If I had married him, I would be married to the President of the United States.

So with this in mind, may we invite you to consider this critical factor that is the key to any success – the team within. How is your inner team? Take some time this week to check in and see what is the state of your value system, are standards constantly met, are your intentions clear, is there a good communication flow between the Conscious and Unconscious? Do all the members of your inner team pull in the same direction? Or do they pull you in different directions? Are they attempting to pull you in the same direction, but do so in an uncoordinated fashion, so that they sabotage each other? 

What would it be like if they were able to cooperate seamlessly? And find a way to spend some time considering the state of your external team? Who do you surround yourself with? Does your external team inspire you? Move you? Motivate you?

If you want to spend some time with a great group of people and explore how to get your inner team in order you are welcome to join us in Greece for our NLP practitioner on the beach (www.nlponthebeach.com) – or if you simply cannot wait until October, join us already this weekend in Belgrade for our Momentum NLP diploma.

Wishing you a wonderful week and sending you oceans of love,

Your playing-for-the-team trainers,

Thomas and Lidija

Lidija Markovic– NLP Trainer (Classic & New Code), NLP Coach

Thomas Björge– NLP Trainer (Classic & New Code), NLP Coach

© Momentum Strategies 2013